You were toxic in the darling way that wine is. You were as bold as neon pink during Pride Week. The first time I heard your loud screech of a voice, I was watching reruns of your talk show with my mom. My mother loved you because you represented the crass part of herself that she adored. I loved you because I inherited the same gene.
But it wasn’t your bluntness that made you an icon. Anyone can be blunt. Anyone can be the girl in the room that says things everyone is thinking but is too scared to. What made you so important was that it wasn’t all just for attention- you were unapologetically yourself. In a world where being unique was waiting safely outside society’s mold, you not only destroyed it, but you made the maker of it your bitch.
You did whatever you wanted and you weren’t afraid to.
When people called you out on whatever the hell they had a problem with, you reveled in it, and because of that, no one could touch you. While it must of hurt at some point, you brushed it off. I didn’t learn how to own my insecurities from friends or family, I learned it from you making fun of your own surgically altered face. Through you, I learned that making a choice simply for the benefit of a man, isn’t a choice worth making-no matter how great the sex is. You taught me that I was better than that. My own parents didn’t teach me I was better than that, for the record.
I sincerely believe that you were the first woman to be honest with the fact that womanhood sometimes is not a beautiful thing. Femininity can really gross and awkward. Sex isn’t always sexy. Being docile is boring, and it’s okay to take the low road and want to cut a bitch. Ultimately though, that’s part of the experience, and while it’s great to think it’s okay, fuck it if it’s not! In fact, fuck it anyway because why not?
So here’s to you, you crazy bitch. Here’s to your sharp wit and impenetrable charm. Here’s to your rough edges and honest heart. Here’s to the one that taught us all, that it is better to ride and die, than to sit still and live. You will be missed. Cheers.